pioneers of ourselves

Radical Honesty Coloring Book

Shameless Hussie #6

              I WANT TO BE SEEN It was the end of a month long journey of heart ache and falling back in love with myself. I had finagled my way through all types of terrain and had met strangers that rejoiced at my way of being a human being. It had all led me to my grandma’s memorial service. She had always been a […]

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Shameless Hussie #5

I hide in crowds of strangers to find myself, trying out different outfits and personas to see if I am capable of anything I desire, and I end up feeling alone and unloveable. I start to trust the strangers around me, or I compare myself to them at the very least, and I realize that there is something wrong with me because I don’t fit into their story. I forget […]

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Shameless Hussie #4

She walked into the cafe looking radiant; I couldn’t help but offer up a compliment to her confident swagger, “I like your outfit!” She looked over at me, “Thanks! I decided to throw out the paper bag today and dress up like the Fashion Queen!”  I smiled and kept drawing, singing along with the soundtrack of a 60s road trip and enjoying the quaint feel of a little town called […]

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Shameless Hussie #3

“I don’t want to end up alone,” people say under their breath, especially if they happen to be around an older person that is single. Every time I become single again I initially rejoice but then almost immediately become obsessed with finding a sexual partner. It is almost an unconscious mission and maybe that is why it feels so peculiar to the instincts in my mind. My body is demanding […]

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Shameless Hussie #2

“If you cleaned yourself better, you would be healthier. You wonder why I don’t go down on you more!” He said to me and I looked up into my brain in shocked disbelief because I was the only witness to this moment; to a lot of these moments. I wasn’t being treated with love; I was being criticized. This is the love that I have grown accustomed to because it […]

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I Have to Save Myself

I lay on the bed waiting for something to happen. We had talked about all sorts of fantasies in our relationship, but each day looked the same, luxuriating to the point of suffocation. He pulled the computer over to rest on his chest as he perused the internet, waiting for noise to stop downstairs so that he could potentially make his first meal after hours and hours of waiting, “I […]

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The Mind and Body

I keep stepping up into unknown plains and sparkling my way through atmospheres of my own domain. I find that it is better to follow a path that is new and exciting then to fall back into patterns that were never inviting.  We are more then this body; we are more then this mind; it is our choice to listen to our spirit’s inclined. I speak of acknowledging the endless […]

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The Child Inside

We all have voices inside of our heads telling us what we want. Sometimes these voices have become the tiniest whisper because we have neglected them or have been so wounded that we are scared to trust ourselves. These voices are there to teach us our way and when we listen to them we get stronger. Part of that journey is accepting that it is safe to be who we […]

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Following Yourself

I am responsible for my own rodeo and nobody else can hear that little voice inside of my head that is saying, “I want to stop talking now!” or “I am ready to be alone!” It is up to me to make space for myself in my life and to start doing the things I want to do in whatever little ways I can. People want to help me by […]

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Releasing Old Patterns

Yesterday, I walked away from a camp job opportunity and it was challenging for my ego because I want to be the kind of person that teaches activities at a camp and can get kids excited about outdoors experiences. The reality is, I just want to write and read in the woods. I am proud of myself for walking away from something that wasn’t my cup of tea so that […]

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